Well... Today is the first Monday of the new year. Waiting to see if this Monday is any different from the other Mondays in the past. So far it is the same. There is a slight difference to this Monday however. It is the first Monday of this month. This means one more Monday to go through till we get ready to leave for my baby boy's Pre-op. It means 3 more Mondays to go through until we start packing to go to the hospital for the weekend to have his surgery on his kidney done that following Friday.
Today it is 9 days till pre-op appointment and 3 weeks 4 days till surgery. Please God give me strength to get through this month. I am trying to stick to my new found believing of not worrying until that day is here, but it is really hard not to. My baby boy's flawless left side is going to have a scar on it after this month. Another battle scar of life. But it's not the fact of him going to have another scar that brings tears to my eyes even this moment while I type this. It's the thought of my baby being in pain. The thought that something can go wrong. Surgery is not 100% safe. Either option they go with does not always 100% fix things. It can lead to more complications and/or problems. The way our luck goes he catches a lot.
My little guy is one of the strongest people I know. I think he is the only one I know who can go through so much and smile right after. How many children do you know can smile right after having surgery on their lip and palate? Swollen tongue puking up blood from swallowing it during surgery, but still stops to smile and try to say love you. Dear sweet Caelan I love you so much and can't find the words to express how much you being in my life has been a blessing. Every day I worry about your health and what obstacle will pop up next for us I think about how much of a precious angel you are. Every second I get to wrap my arms around you and hold you is a second my day seems to be better. The sweet kisses and love yous I get from you are gifts of love I always treasure. Life is never boring with you around and I know your terror will be placed upon our home, your brothers and our cats for years to come. Hopefully with 2011 starting out with this surgery it is a sign that you will have a healthy happy year ahead of you. No more hospital stays on your birthday. Only happy birthdays. Your second birthday wasn't all that and neither was your 3rd so let's make the 4th one a happy and fun one this year. :)
Hope everyone has a good Monday while your lives return back to the rat race with Vacation being over. Back to the grind stone and the life of running here and there.
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